Light and Darkness

Impulsive Nae and her aftermath

I had acquired a part time job last month. Nothing big. Working at a convenience store. I hated that I was doing it. Felt like I had dwindled down to nothing in the employment arena. But it was a job with some money.

Never really liked it. Told my manager that. The training was idiotic and incomplete. Didn't really feel like I fit in. Everyone complained about everyone else. But it was a job...gave me some money.

The assistant manager is a Filipina. Typical Filipina personality. Told me that I was pronouncing my name wrong all these years. Would tell me that I'm Filipina and should now better on a number of different things like cleaning. sigh....but at least I had money and didn't feel like a complete moocher off my mother.

Then today. The Filipina pissed me off. For adequate enough reasons for me to quit.

My car is in the shop with at least $1600 worth of repairs. I've three hundred dollars to my name now since giving my mom $500 for the car. I've wasted too much time being unhappy. My life has little meaning. I'm not wasting emotion or time to work at a job that I hate.

Surprise!

I am back.

Unfortunately, with the move to Pensacola and the current state of unemployment, I had to withdraw from the blogging (still hate that word after nearly a decade of doing this) world. BUT I'm back. I had been active on Facebook (isn't everyone and their mothers) during my sabbatical so hope you creeped around a bit. I missed this place. My sweet ol' space.

Well, Hello again. I'm Naomi. Let the chaos continue.

 

Post Thanksgiving Meal Stupor

It's that time of day to take a nap. I cooked the meal. It was delicious. Now, I'm lazy. Would it be a bad thing to abandon my mom and daughter for a couple hours of blissful laziness in the bed? Anyone want to come and snuggle with me?

Fare thee well, DFW. I barely knew thee.

In a week, I'll be back in Pensacola, Florida. See this face? Well, if you could see my face right now, you would notice the obvious frown cut into my mouth and the scrunched brow. I am not thrilled with this at all.

Without going into too much detail - not because I don't mind the juicy gossip that comes from being me but rather, waking from a troubled sleep at 530a leaves me impatient for details - I'm just not cutting it here in Texas. So, to save Em and myself from drowning in ridiculous amounts of trouble, I'm tucking my tail and returning to Florida.

Regarding DFW, my list of people and things I will miss is long. The potential of what I felt I could accomplish here is too heavy right now to address. But honestly, I will miss Z the most. There is sadness in this that I will not explain. Anger and worry show themselves too. I just don't want to say goodbye to him.

sigh.....I am so not ready for this.

Jolie, the true vagabond

Jolie has run away for the upteenth time.

I'm thinking this dog has something wired in her brain to just take off. She slides out of her collar on walks and bolts. Any other time, she's dragging her poor, old self along. You can see the grey in her muzzle and the years in her step. But if she manages to fanagle her way out of her collar? She's gone in a flash.

I worry about her. I look for her for hours. Our name and number is on her collar but where is it? At the end of her leash sitting her in the apartment.

She was a street dog when we adopted her. I guess she prefers us over that.

Hope you come home, punkass!

The Latest Medical Adventure

Last Monday something bit me at work. Figured it was a mosquito or something insignificant like that. Scratched the bite. It swelled. Tried to squeeze the little pimple like bit. And from there? Well, I'm seeing the doctor every day for a shot in my hip and taking medicines galore!

I didn't report it because I thought it nothing on Monday. By the next day, it had swelled beyond normalcy but still no report. By Friday, I was in 'you're going to lose your arm if you don't do something now' territory and figured it was time to do something. Why didn't I say something earlier? Well, listening to people of your company talk numbers about how much a store accident costs and seeing their faces...I didn't want to be the reason we're not in profit.

THEN, at my second follow-up visit today, the doctor said I had no choice but to go to the emergency room because my brain could explode with how high my blood pressure was.

Stupid, stupid me. The lack of general concern for myself. In my defense, no one likes to tell the boss you're hurt and sick. The response is usually unfavorable during a heavy work day on top of that. Also, I have no money. I never do for stupid doctor's visits and prescriptions. AND WHO THE HELL wants to be on a million different meds.

Speaking of that hellish ordeal, I have three oral prescriptions for the bite running through my vein plus a syrine administered drug plus a new tetanus shot. MY BODY ACHES simply from the drugs. Bonus is the addition of three other drugs today pumped into my system for the blood pressure and THREE MORE PRESCRIPTIONS TO START TAKING TOMORROW! I'm a walking, fucking chemistry lab.

I have another follow-up tomorrow. Probably another shot.

sigh

 

I hate that little bitch of a bug that bit me. I BETTER GET FUCKING SPIDEY SENSES OUT OF THIS!

Late Night Phone Call

I find myself awake, wishing for another person to talk to me.

Um, excuse me. Could you tell me what's written on my forehead?

Apparently, I must have something like a fucking neon above my head or magic marker on my forehead or a natural musk that tells MEN TO FUCK WITH ME!!!!!!!

Honestly tired of of one of the following scenarios always occurring in my love life:

1. He's married or somehow attached to someone else.

2. Man is attracted to me and I don't feel the same.

3. I'm attracted to man and he doesn't feel the same.

I'm being good. Since last relationship (or word that better describes it), I've withdrawn my name for the cosmic dating world. I'm no good at it. I'm lousy, to be frank. So....I've resigned to live life as a spinster. Easier to be asexual than emotionally fucked with.

Really, God.....you didn't think I had enough to deal with in my life that you thought this would be funny?! You're hilarious, Da. Fucking hilarious! Same dude who thought it funny to make Carrot Top is influencing my love life? Ha! I'm laughing. Really, I am. On the INSIDE!

Bitch, I miss you!

Fuck! I miss your emails and phonecalls.

courageous you

Tell me how you feel. You might be surprised by my reaction. I may already know.