The DON'Ts and DOs of Friday Night Doobie

If you ever decide to smoke a big fat one and go see a movie, may I make a few suggestions for your Friday night movie viewing pleasure?

1. DON'T chain smoke the marry-jew-wahn-a. The smell is overpowering. Regular cigarettes leave a distinct smell on clothes. Imagine funny cigarettes. tsk tsk
2. DON'T come with a huge group of other pot smoking teenagers. Crowds catch attention.
3. DON'T order more than $40 worth of food for one person. Really?! One order of nachos is enough.
4. DON'T order food at the register directly next to the three sheriff's department officers who are assigned duty to the theater for the night. With four registers open, do you NEED to pick the one next to the UNIFORMED men carrying tasers, nightsticks, handcuffs, and guns? Notice my head shake.
5. DON'T continue to chow down on said munchies when they ask you to turn around and spread 'em when they decide to frisk you. Ok, that was just too funny. I've never seen anything like that; and if I weren't so afraid of having people notice the pee running down my leg, I would have laughed out loud.
6. DO hide your bong instead of leaving it on the front seat when you go into your movie so that the officers aren't waiting to arrest you when your movie is over. If the smell wasn't probable cause to arrest the lot of you, geez, I think that was.
7. DO realize that you will get a visit to the tank for reeking of pot and being such a dumb ass for going out in public and smelling of such....I think I may have gotten a contact high.