Today, I have an interview for a part-time job at a bookstore. I'm excited. Silly, but it's on my bucket list to work in one. I worry that my tattoo on my wrist may be a hindrance. Debating whether or not I cover it up with bangles and a watch. Probably will until I know differently.
I had planned on going to the beach. Will have to save that until tomorrow now. Between weather and an unwilling daughter, I've put off going for a couple weeks now. I don't feel like going alone but may have to do so if Pie doesn't agree on going this week. If the weather holds, tomorrow.
Speaking of my child, she turns seventeen on the seventh. She has no direction for her future life. The control freak part of me is freaking out. I had more direction with what I wanted to do with my life at seventeen than I do now, but I know more than not that kids her age shouldn't have clear directions. She hasn't developed completely to understand what she wants. Doesn't keep me from worrying though. I just don't want her to be anything like me. I want her to be so much better. She'll be ok, right? Please, someone, tell me she'll figure it out and be ok.
Dreams are constantly of the men of my life...Angus was last week. This weeks seems to be the sexy musician again. The thing about the SM is that I have these dreams that are about him but he's almost never in them. I'm usually partying or hanging out with people who are somehow connected to him. I don't know who these people are in my dreams. Composites of real and imaginary people, I assume. But he's always just around the corner, in a way. It's like I'm always waiting for him to return home. Don't need a dream dictionary or Freud or a soothsayer to explain it. I know what it's all about. In last night's doozie, I was partying at his house. Lots of people there as usual. Members of what would be his band. But he's not present. There's a guy that is paying me lots of attention and I like it. Band mate and close friend. And suddenly I'm in this relationship with him, still waiting for SM. BUT this other guy is also partly the SM. Dreams, eh. Like some say....just dumping ground from bits and pieces of the day. We'll pretend this one was that....not some unconscious lusting for a man no longer present in my life.
Did have an influential dream a few nights ago about a story. Told Pie about it. She asked me if I would actually write this one out in a novel. Telling question, yea?! I've been thinking about it because the damn plot is great and getting there is involving. I write some of it up and see what happens.
Between this shite post and traipsing around the internet....well, I've dicked around enough. I need to ready myself. Good day to all.
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